I'm learning how to endure to the end

Because I love the Lord I am learning how to endure to the end. 

A few years ago my life got turned upside down. My parents came into my room as they always do at bed time for family prayer. Something didn't seem right but I didn't know what. My dad solemnly looked up at me then back down at the bed and explained that the doctor appointments he thought were going to be routine ended up resulting in a different conclusion than expected. He figured it was going to be nothing, just a regular check up. Something you must understand about my dad is that he was as healthy as a horse! No he didn't run marathons or anything crazy like that but there was nothing seriously wrong with him. As he began to speak and trying to explain to me what was going on I could tell this wasn't just a regular doctors appointment he was updating me on. He explained to me that he had been diagnosed with Leukemia and needed to go to the hospital right away starting chemo. My mouth dropped to the basement and I didn't know whether to cry or to scream or what. I looked at my mom who gestured for me to hug my dad and of course so I did.

We had NO idea what the future had in store. He was in the hospital for 67 days receiving chemo and was finally let home when the treatment was done and it was safe for him to return home. Gratefully I was homeschooled and got to accompany my mother to the hospital often but see I still had sports at the local high school as well as I was in the band at the local high school. And I didn't have a drivers license so from the help of some sweet friends I was taken where I needed to go when I needed to go there. Over the course of those two months my dad was in the hospital several people came and helped out at the house making it safe for my dad to come home to and such. My heart is still over filled with gratitude for those who helped.

My dad came home and was informed that he was in remission but still needed to come back for check ups just to make sure. Because you see remission doesn't mean cured it means it's not  life threatening right now. My dad was very happy to be home. Although he was the thinnest I have ever seen him and the palest I had ever seen him, somehow he carried around a smile every where he went. We played games together and laughed and for moments we escaped the harsh reality we were living in.

At the month mark of being in remission my dad received a phone call that punched us all right in the stomach. Dad was no longer in remission and the type of Leukemia he has now has no real cure or had never been recorded as having anyone successfully going through chemo and being in remission. Most of the people who had the type of cancer my dad now has, only received the chemo for 2 years and then they passed away. Knowing that you are a ticking time bomb makes you reevaluate a few things. There are SO many ways my dad could have reacted to this news. He could have gotten severely depressed and mourned over his life. He could have gotten mad and been on edge often, possible yelling and getting mad for no reason. He could have gotten mad at the doctors and the nurses. But he didn't do any of those things. Instead he showed great courage. As many of these stories go he was quite incredible. I remember him being sad but he never let that consume him. He sought to heal broken relationships. He prayed and read his scriptures. Instead of abandoning God or feeling as if God abandoned him, he went to God for strength and help.

You see my dad was given a HUGE stumbling block. Something that could have ruined his outlook on life, his attitude towards life but instead he used it as a reason to withhold nothing. He got back on the horse so to speak. This I believe is what enduring to the end is all about.

Paul in speaking to the Romans explains what it means to endure to the end, to ensure your salvation. He talked about being kind, showing love, being obedient, seeking after good things, not letting the world consume you. All of these things were shown to me in my dad's actions. He's still enduring! He still gets chemo every two months. BUT ladies and gentlemen he has lived 6 years past his expiration date. And his platelet counts and red blood counts are better then they were the first day he was admitted to the hospital. He's a walking miracle! And I attribute a lot of that to how he handled himself. And I believe even if he had sadly left us here and returned to our God above things would have been ok because he was ok. He had enjoyed times with family and friends. He had put his whole heart into the service of God. He was happy. (He still is happy!!)

So I remind myself often when I feel like I am ENDURING to the end, that there is no need to feel like woe is me because I have every reason to be happy. My dad realized that in a time when life seemed very fragile. I have no life threatening disease, I do experience heart ache and hard things but I realized watching my dad go through something so awful that I can do hard things too. I can endure to the end....no, I can ENJOY to the end.

Because I love the Lord I am learning how to endure to the end. Because the Lord loves me He gives me strength to enjoy to the end. 

I love rocks

Because I love the Lord I love ROCKS! 

May seem a little silly but indulge me for a moment!
Rocks have many great qualities don't you think! They are tough. Some of them are immovable.  Some of them are very beautiful. Some provide shelter. Others provide homes. Some are REALLY BIG others are really small. They are naturally created! Some are formed from volcano lava, others are formed from intense storms, and others are formed from intense pressure. They are made up of many different minerals. They provide many with an adventurous recreational activity, rock climbing. They have been used to form ancient cities and many new buildings. Rocks are pretty cool.

I can see it in your eyes  why in the world would my love for the Lord produce a love for rocks? Let's examine what Christ and rocks have in common.

Rocks are tough: 

I don't know of anyone else tougher. Not in the sense of gang member tough. But rather emotionally and spiritually tough. Christ suffered greater than anyone else and yet still sought to forgive those who were killing Him. He was tempted above we could ever understand and still turned down such temptation. Christ is a pretty tough guy.

Rocks are sometimes immovable: 

I add the sometimes here because know that some rocks are very small and can be moved. (I had a gravel driveway growing up and believe me that didn't just happen naturally....we put them there...I have remnants of those muscles). Christ is very much immovable! NO one could encourage Him to lower His standards or to reject who He was. He died and suffered because He wouldn't budge. He knew who He was and what He was supposed to do and not even a KING could persuade Him to do or be anything else. Like rocks Christ is immovable.

Rocks provide shelter: 

"For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy." Psalms 61:3. Should not Christ be all of our shelters from the storm? I know of no better shelter than the arms of Christ. 

Rocks are formed under intense conditions: 

"He is despised and rejected of men; 

a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; 

and we hid as it were our faces from him; 

he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

Surely he has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows;

yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

But he was wounded for our transgressions, 

he was bruised for our iniquities;

 the chastisement of our peace was upon him; 

and with his stripes we are healed…..

He was oppressed, and he was afflicted,

 yet he opened not his mouth;

 he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, 

and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb

 so he opened not his mouth."

- Mosiah 14: 3-5, 7.

Need I say more? 

Rocks are made up of many different kinds of minerals: 

Christ's character is made up of so many virtues! Faith, patience, charity, hope, forgiveness, long suffering, integrity, humility, and obedience just to list a few. He is our Savior, a man of many perfect qualities. 

Have I convinced you that Christ and rocks have a lot in common? This is why I love rocks. They remind me of who I can turn to in times of trial, of adversity, or heartache, and when I need forgiveness.

Because I love the Lord I love rocks. Because He loves me He is my rock. 

I seek to improve

Because I love the Lord I seek to improve, to be better, to ultimately be what He wants me to be. 

A little over a year ago my companion and I happened upon this very tall black man in a very sketchy neighborhood. Needless to say it was a little scary at first. But we had been taught as missionaries to talk to everyone and the Spirit was prompting us to go say hello to this man. We went over and said hello. He asked us who we were. We told him we were missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We asked if he'd ever heard of the Book of Mormon. He replied, "I've met missionaries like you, except they were boys and yes they left me that book. I've read it a couple times but have no idea what it all means." With great excitement in our eyes we set up an appointment to come back and talk more because

we had to be somewhere right at that moment. We set up the appointment for the next day. We came back and there he was ready and willing to learn. We taught him about the Book of Mormon and about the prophet Joseph Smith and about how Christ's church is back on the earth. He soaked it all up like a sponge. We continued teaching him for several weeks. We worked with him to give up smoking. We taught him repentance, the plan of happiness, and about our Savior Jesus Christ. With every lesson he became more and more excited. You could tell the spirit was filling this man with truth. He was soon baptized after he gave up smoking. And at his baptism he had the opportunity to get up and speak to those that were present. His words have been etched into my heart forever. 

Tearfully he proclaimed 

to us all, 

"I have been searching for the truth for 52 years. 

It saddens me that it has taken me 

52 years to find it.

 But oh how grateful I am

 that I FINALLY have it."

What a profound realization for him and us all. I grew up in the church and as he would say have always had the truth. I grew up with it in my home. It's a part of me. This man gave up everything he thought he knew and listened to the Spirit of the Lord and is becoming what God wants him to be.With heavenly help he gave up one of the hardest addictions to overcome. He accepted truths that he previously had disagreed with. He reads the scriptures ever day. He prays without ceasing. He is no longer lost at sea searching for shore, he's found the lighthouse and is on the path to returning home to his heavenly home. 

Why you may ask did I tell you that story with the title I (me!!) seek to improve? Let me explain. I learned something those few weeks we were teaching this man. I was taught what it meant to truly turn your heart to the Lord withholding nothing! This man improved not only himself spiritually but emotionally and physically. And all because he loves the Lord. He didn't do it for us. He did it because he loves the Lord so much he was willing to completely change and become someone new. Why shouldn't I seek to do the same? We all have flaws, things we can work on, things we need to get rid of and things we need to add to our lives. I have found a few new things that I need to improve on and I have made goals to make them better. I know that as we find ways to improve like this man, the Lord will give us strength to accomplish great things and become someone new and improved.

I seek to improve because I love the Lord. Because the Lord loves me He blesses us with the strength to improve.